Friday, March 16, 2012

I Have a Serious Case of Road Rage

For my regular readers, you know how happy I get when it's Friday! :)

               This may or may not be what I look like every Friday morning. Just sayin.

The feeling of excitement I get every Friday morning is so great that I feel like nothing can bring my spirits down.... especially when it's pay day too!

That is, however, until I get on I-75 to drive to work....

Note: Before I begin my blog rage about road rage, I need to make an apology....

Sorry Mom and Dad if you end up reading this.

          What? I can't help it that my road rage and lead foot syndrome is hereditary!

Yes. I have lead foot syndrome. In fact, because there is no known cure yet, my lead foot syndrome has given me quite a history with the po-po's when it comes to speeding tickets. Mehhhh.

However, I haven't gotten a ticket in over a year and a half, so I am on a good role!! (Knock on wood).

I wouldn't call my recent clean streak this past year lucky though... you see, over time, I have developed a special power that allows me to spot those tricky b**tards in every crook and cranny that they hide! So yes, I have just become THAT good at spotting them, slowing down, and playing pretend.

I am quite aware that more than half the time I am driving, I am never really in any rush to get to my destination. I just can't help myself. I am a speed demon and I guess I love the feeling of passing people. Judge if you will.

However, believe me when I say that I am the first person to admit that I have road rage. But just because I have road rage does not mean that I am reckless. I am still very safe and very cautious of my surroundings when driving. I understand that the last thing I want to be involved in is a car accident. In all reality though, and in my defense, half the reason accidents are caused is due to people being clueless and not abiding by the rules of the road. (Yes, I am aware that by speeding I am not abiding by the rules).

But here is where my road rage comes in.

Prepare yourself.

IT ABSOLUTELY DRIVES ME CRAZY WHEN:

A.
People see me coming up in the left lane and still proceed to cut me off, for no reason, only just to drive the speed limit. Seriously?

B. People get in the fast lane to make it look like they are going to pass someone, and then doesn't pass them. In fact, they go the EXACT same speed as the person they made it seem it like they wanted to pass, and THEREFORE I can't pass either car.

It absolutely, positively drives me nuts when I can't pass someone. And it absolutely, positively baffles me that people are so clueless. GET OVER OR SPEED UP!

So yes... admittedly, this is me when A happens:

And this is me when B happens:

No dramatization in these pictures. This is literally how I am.

The worst is when I can't pass the person, they clearly see me flailing my arms at them because I am so infuriated... then we get off the same exit... then they turn into the same apartment complex as me... and then they end up being my neighbor. meh... awkward.

If that's the case.. then I just pull one of these:
                        Thoughts: I feel like an A-Hole, please don't recognize me.

Jo(W)anna know what though? At least I recognize that I have road rage and am willing to admit that it is something I need to work on. Half the time people with road rage blame it on "turrets". No dude, own up to it, you don't have turrets.

                                       "Sorry, I have turrets" Yeah, no you don't. 

So, if you are one of those people that I am ranting about in this blog, then I apologize that you have to deal with people like me...... just like how I feel sorry for myself that I have to deal with people like you. It's the circle of life.... Not really though, you really need to learn how to drive...

hahaha just kidding.

Not really.

So anyways, I'm sure half all of you probably won't want to ride with me in a car if I am driving after reading this. Secretly, that was my plan! You wanna drive? OK! Gas prices are super high, so be my guest! ;-)

But for all you road ragers out there just like me, you're not alone! I know how you feel. We know we need to take chill pills every once in a while, but we also wouldn't feel that way if people just knew how to drive! So in reality, it isn't our fault... right? :-)

                                   Please pardon me for the indecency! It was funny.

Also, per request, Happy birthday Papi Sanchez! I hope this makes your birthday even better! :-)

2 comments:

  1. I am TOTALLY one of those people you hate to drive behind. I go over the speed limit, but not by much, and when a car comes flying up behind me, I purposely slow down -- just to be an asshat, I suppose!

    Kyle hates the way I drive so much that I hardly ever do it anymore, he does most of the driving -- so it works out really well for both of us, haha ;)

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  2. Hahahaha Carrie! If I know the person in front of me, than that doesn't bother me, I suppose!! You're off the hook! ;)

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